Sunday, March 1, 2009

love spectrum.

March Already?!

: A delicious, plump orange :)
[Writing]: Up a chemistry lab report. (Booooooo) And this(yay!)
[Desiring]: Traveling anywhere really. Preferably Europe.
[Jammin' to]: My Letter - Flaw
[Missing]: Shayla. A few hours at the mall is so not enough :(.
[Sporting]: This indigo/black tweed print hoodie, along with blue skinny jeans, pearl bracelet, and friendship ones.
[Disappointment]: Dropkick Murphy's tickets are sold out.

Hope you're alright, it's been rough for me.
Thinking all night, about the places I'd be
If I maybe, just did a little bit more.
You might have let me become a man for sure.
And if I might express one concern, it seems an issue
All day at every turn. What's the next step,
The latest hole in my life. What's next for me to learn?
[My Letter - Flaw]

The spectrum of love.

I've always believed the theory of everyone having one true love, which they find and encounter at some point in their lifetime, and that's it. However, I'm starting to think maybe that isn't true. Love can exist on many different levels, and that's what makes it so confusing. You can love your family, and you can love your friends. But things get contorted once your love of a friend begins to sway to something bigger, something romanctic. Once you love someone, you usually feel like they're the only person you're capable of feeling that way towards. But, things change. Sometimes it's inevitable, they lose their feelings for you, and you're left scrambling for reasons. Or something out of both of your hands happens, like when people grow old and their significant other passes away. You may care a great, phenomonal deal about someone, but sometimes, you must move on. Either that, or be content with loneliness. I do however think that there's someone out there for everyone who just tips the scale on the spectrum. That person who you feel more strongly for than you ever have, who knows and understands you better than anyone else. The person you're so intrigued by and comfortable around that you could slip a ring on your finger, say "I do", and stay with them for the rest of your life. That's true love, if you mean it. But can you have more than one of those? I couldn't tell you. There's no point in convincing yourself though, that love only happens once. If you're certain of that, you deny yourself the chance to be proven wrong, and potentially being happier than you would have. There are so many people in the world, it's foolish to dwell on one who doesn't want you. Life has a funny way of tangling people in situations, and if something's meant to be, somehow it will happen. I pin that on human nature, not fate or a god. If two people truly want to be with eachother, sooner or later they will probably click. And if two people are meant to wind up with eachother, their separate paths will intertwine again. In the meantime, it's best to keep an open heart and an open mind to new opportunities, and remember that love is a spectrum, it's not just black or white. It's a beautiful rainbow, a plethra of human emotion.

I think I just needed to convince myself of that.
I've spent too much time thinking about love, but now it's out of my system. :) Phew.

  1. Friday afternoon I went to the library with Jenna, Julie, Amanda, and John :). I love going there. We're all big book/movie junkies, so once we open the doors, we all disperse and scatter to find new things to borrow. I checked out two books this time. Post Secret- A lifetime of Secrets, which is a collection of all of those artsy postcards that tell the sender's secret in a creative way. I think they're interesting. You can also look at them on the website( ) Then I checked out another book, A mind of it's own, which is supposed to describe how the brain decides the things we don't consciously control, or something like that.

  2. Friday night Amanda and I went back to Julie's, Jenna was busy. Tom had two of his friends there, and they were being lazy couch potatoes, not letting us play Pokemon on nintendo 64 >:/. Once their movie was over (which two of them were sleeping through, haha) we battled. We got sleepy after awhile and went to bed.

  3. The next day we went to the mall to see Shayla :D. It was us three, along with Jenna, Ashley(Shayla's roommate who drove her) and Ashley's boyfriend, Dakota. It was a pretty fun time, even though our mall is boring. We spiced it up by playing a game of hide and seek! It was great :). Shayla, Jenna, and I hid in the dressing room of the Bon Ton. We gave the opposite team clues while we tried on funky grandma clothes. So great, haha. I took some pictures, but most of them are on Shayla's camera, so I'll post them later when she sends them to me :). Also, we ate at our favorite place --- Panera's!

  4. Sunday was a bore. I sat here all day, I didn't step foot outside once. I did get my homework done, if that counts for anything. Tom came over for like two seconds, if that counts for anything. He wanted to pick up his money from my parents/his bosses :P, so he could buy an xbox 360. He invited me to go with them, but I declined because I thought I might see Shayla today. Turns out she ran too late at Dakota's with Ashley though, so she didn't have time for one last visit :/. I miss that girl. It was really good to be able to see her yesterday though, making jokes, laughing, hugging. I wish we still lived close.

Accomplishment of the day: I finally successfully made crepes! Nicole gave me the recipe ages ago, but tonight I got around to doing it :). About the third or fourth one, they began to actually resemble the thin, delectable, french breakfast food. I even had the ambition to continue making them for my parent's dinner, which they were happily surprised with.
So I think I'm going to attempt to advance my culinary skills. I've always been weary of cooking, because we lack "from scratch" ingredients, and my mother has never been big on cooking. Given those circumstances, it's always been easier to just munch on microwavable entres, or eat foods with little to no preparation. I want to broaden my taste bud horizons though ;P. Since the crepes were not a complete bust, I think I'll keep on trucking. Any suggestions of what I should make next?


Wandering Child said...

congrats about the crepes. I've never had them but I hear the French enjoy them.

The second paragraph was a spoof from a quote from Shakespeare's "Merchant of Venice" I think it was.

James said...

I have french cousins, and they know all about crepes. They can be quite delicious, if made correctly. The best thing about they, you can make them using anything. I mean A.N.Y.T.H.I.N.G.! The library sounds fun as does the weekend. Did you ever decide about that special school and all that jazz? Love is a difficult subject... very difficult indeed.

Nicole Linette said...

ohmygodohmygoygodohmygod YESSSS!!! How fantastic Olive XD NICE JOB! Hahaha I can't you believe you did it, phew that post was from.. July?! So awesome. Did you like them? What did you eat them with?

.. I'll calm'er down now... :)

I just went to the library and checked out a "teenage" cookbook. Haha, I'll let you know if I see anything good.
Love, love, love. Hard to think about, and it hurts sometimes to think about what I had and lost. But there is always someone else, I just haven't found him yet. I hope your human nature theory proves true (for the both of us) :)

peace&love, nicole.

Kaitlin said...

I pretty much agree with all you said about the love thing. I've been thinking about it a lot lately too and I've kind of just decided to let fate lead me where it may -- as you said, if something is meant to happen, it will.

I love crepes. they're so tasty with Nutella and powdered sugar on them :P

N a t a l i e. said...

My philosophy on love is pretty much... just wait for the right person to come along, I guess? I'm not going to waste my time worrying about relationships right now because I know that there's a pretty huge chance that it's not going to work out in the end. One person has to break up with the other sooner or later, unless they're planning on getting married. Sure, having a boyfriend wouldn't hurt, but if I don't have one I'm just not going to dwell on it :P

I love looking at all the Post Secrets! I have a folder on my computer filled with a zillion off of the website. I really need to read this whole list of books that I've made, but I'm either too busy or too lazy. Spending the day with all of your friends sounds like a blast! That's great that you could see Shayla, even though she already had to leave ):

And hoorah for crepes! Haha, I remember that post of Nicole's, that seems so long ago... I, sadly, have very little culinary talent. But I bet they were tasty!

Alayna Whisper said...

Love is a complex thing. No one has figured it out.

Aren Becks said...

March is coming in like a lamb, out like a lion. At the farmer's market last summer, there was an orange the size of my head, it was delicious. I don't believe in someone having a 'soul mate' or having a 'one true love', but I do believe someone can have a true love. That's all I can add. You explained a lot of the vague feelings I'm feeling already. I love Postsecret, I always rush to their site on blogspot each Sunday to see if they have posted a new post. Crepes are delicious, I made some with banannas and chocolate chips the other day.

Aren Becks said...

I don't think that I'm a blogging machine persay, I just have a tendency of having a lot to say. Spot on, I was aiming for a spring type template. Especially when I saw the header! I just love it, it reminds me of getting lost in the streets of the city, with just the necessities of a backpack and bicycle.